Chattanooga Riverboat Company

My company had a christmas party in the 3rd Deck Burger Bar over the weekend. When you walk in it reminds of a really cool, laid back lounge. The bartenders and servers were great. We had an appetizer buffet that was delicious, and the bartenders there pour really strong drinks! Obviously that was nice to see!! Great place to really do anything at, whether you have 2 or 200 ppl. It’s a huge space.

This is the WORST entertainment we have ever seen or heard on any boat/ship dinner cruise. They had this approx. seventy year old man playing the electric piano, using an electronic drum machine and horribly singing flat! At first? we thought this guy was a comical joke! But after fifteen minutes, we sadly realized this was reality and we would be stuck with this horrible entertainment for the next (2) two hours!We took the 6:00 p.m. Saturday night dinner cruise December 27, 2014 This old man was the worst singer we have ever heard, except in no-contest amateur kareoke bars. He used the same NON-STOP “square dancing cotton-eyed Joe tempo” (on his electronic drum machine) for almost an hour and a half trying to sing a variety of songs with this horrible old man’s voice, mostly flat. (Does he not know that these electronic drum machines do have a variety of tempos?) His corny jokes were straight from “Yee Haw!” The TV show in the 1970’s.Whenever he tried to sing a high-note, “We thought the boat was going to sink!” This guy makes the worst kareoke singer sound really good! His electric piano playing was actually pretty good. He should have just played instrumental music and not sang. We went upstairs to the top deck and they ironically had his horrible singing voice piped all through the ship or boat! He tried to talk like Buck Owens, but just sounded like an ignorant Southern hick laughing at his very own corny (KORN NEWS) jokes! “he may have been drunk?”You could probably hear the dogs “howling!” on the sides of the Tennessee river! he was so bad. No one ever clapped after his performance. Most of his songs he would actually “talk the words” instead of singing. FYI: These electronic drum machines also have over 500 tempos, at the touch of a button, which he probably used three at the most, during his entire performance. What an amateur and pure laziness for respect to his audience. He passed out tambourines to the audience and this made matters worse because the audience has NO timing or beat! He never even took a break so that we could at least get some peace and quiet. We honestly believe this guy has been doing this same routine for so long during his life-time, that he could care less if anyone in the audience was listening? Has this guy never heard himself sing? What a joke? We were appalled that such a highly acclaimed cruise ship/boat would charge so much money ($85.90 for two adults total) and use such an amateur horrible so-called musician. What was really irritating? Was the fact that this guy never changed this NON-STOP “square dancing tempo” for almost an hour and a half? My God! Give it a rest sometimes! Unfortunately? electronic drum machines also do NOT have drum rolls to give songs more flavor and variety.Th staff told us this terrible entertainment was their weekly regular guy! They seemed to agree just how bad this guy was? This cruise was (2) two hours of torture! The buffet was also very small and only lasted for about 25 minutes! The prime rib was bloody but good with stringed green beans and red potatoes and some kind of Cajun creole soup, which was good, they used mayonnaise for salad dressing? For desert they had chocolate cheese cake, and that was it?. Be sure to eat very fast, because the crew will try to rush you!